Back on the mountain top. kat sitting, drinking coffee in the early morning. reflecting on life, Mexico, borders, artworks I want to make, images from the first return from my artist residency in the communites of Mata Ortiz and Casas Grande, Chihuahua,Mexico.
My traveling compadre, Jason who came to originally help me move to Mexico ended up with us both with the mission to go find what we could learn about the horse and ranching traditions of the area for a potential "intercambio" with is a cultural exchange with the Dry Creek Arts Fellowship. http://www.drycreekarts.com/home.html
It was a process that involved the sense of being lost and found at least four or five times a day as we navigated our way through being accostomed to a new language, a new community, and learning what you seek isn't always what you think you'll find. To put it in one of the most clearly stated "signs" I've ever recieved, our new friend, Micky Vanderwagen, said as the full moon was rising and the sun was setting over the Mata Ortiz valley in a spectacular display of gold, " You are not here because you want to be, it's because it's your destiny."
I returned last week after crossing the border with PONCHO VILLA and the 8th annual Villa Cabalgata with over 100 riders who rode for over 12 days and over 200 miles along the highways and open vistas of golden land and tilled fields to cross the border at Polomas, NM. What a feeling that overtook me as we stood divided by the Border Fence from our new traveling friends; people who brought us into the folds of their community, shared food with us, gave us shelter, fresh milk from cows, offered us horses, friendship, and examples of how to live; with grace, kindness, generosity of spirit and partaking of homemade chili, pasole',tortillas and beans. There they were. and Here we stood waiting for them to crossover. I wanted to be on the otherside; and I can't wait to return.
I miss waking up to the songs of birds and the ringing bells of the church; first at 6:30 and then at 7am. I miss the smell of the wood fire from the night before, but have been appreicative of the little things like hot water flowing out of a tap,
and being surrounded in a bath of really hot water. I miss candle and lamp light in my 1890 adobe; the creaky board floor, and waking up wondering what will I learn and see today.
I have fallen in love with Mexico and Life will never be the same.
FROM PLANETWAVES.NET http://planetwaves.net
The thing about speaking our truth involves the challenge of finding our voice -- something that I am learning to do these days. Often the greatest observations and insights come in moments of silence, not in clear sentences but in feelings, visions, sensations, faded memories. Articulating these is truly an art.
There is the other thing about finding your voice -- not everyone is always going to like what you say. Then comes the need for acceptance, and the fact is if we learn to accept ourselves there is no need for outer approval, and speaking from the heart becomes easy and filled with a sense of purity and clarity. We need to learn to believe in ourselves more, live without guilt and recognize others in life who strive to live by this principle.
Feelings aren't right or wrong, they just are. Acknowledging them can be our first step to freedom.
